It's been rough

I have been at this for almost 3 weeks and I have lost 4lbs. I have cheated, felt super guilty and gotten back on the horse.

I want to be able to just stay on the darn horse!! So I can do this permanently! Why do I cheat?! I tell my self no a million times before I go ahead an eat it! Yesterday saw a fruit salad at the restaurant and no I had to go for the chicken fingers and creamed corn and mac and cheese! then I feel like crap; physically and emotionally.

I feel stuck! I was 215 before I had lap band surgery and almost 6months later I am still in the 200's. I loose 1 lb and gain 3?!

I am stronger than these, I cannot let this keep ruling my life. I have plans and things to do and A LIFE TO LIVE!